My name is Emdy, a 38-year-old man. I got married two years ago due to pressure from my family, especially my mother who wanted her only son to settle down and become a responsible man.
I had dated Joan for over three years at that time and seemed the perfect choice for me, going by the fact that my mother and two sisters loved her and had started calling her their wife right from the first day I introduced her to them.
I lost my father when I was in my first year at the university and being the only male child, my mother transferred the affection she had for my father to me and did everything possible to make me comfortable.
My mother went out of her way to provide for me, even selling her things to pay my school fees. She denied herself so many good things of life just to see me through life.
After my sisters got married and let the house, my mother put the pressure on me and said I must get married so that my wife would take care of her in her old age. She kept at it, even went for deliverance services on my behalf.
I kept assuring her that I would get married at the right time when I found the right woman. I always prayed for God to give me a woman who would love my mother and take very good care of her, so when Joan showed the signs fo such a woman, I did not hesitate in asking her to marry.
But how was I to know that she was just doing all those things to impress me and get me to marry her? Joan changed immediately after we got married. My mother had been living with me when we got married but suddenly, Joan changed towards her, often starving her and maltreating her in my absence.
Whenever mom told me about what Joan was doing, the way she spoke and insulted her, I would calm her down, telling her to give my wife time to adjust to the fact that she is now a married woman.
I would talk to my wife in private, telling her to accord my mother the respect she deserved. But the thing got to a point when my wife would refuse to cook and whenever I queried her, she would say my mother should also ook since she is my first wife.
I thought she was joking initially but when she insisted that my mother must leave my house and go back to her husband’s home, I had to take another look at the whole situation.
Since I did not want any quarrel between them, I spoke to my older sisters as we all agreed that mom should interchange visits and rotate among all, something we thought would not cause any friction.
But since my mother left, my wife has refused to allow her to come to our house. Even when we had our baby, Joan refused to allow my mother to come and visit us. The most annoying thing is that her mother and other family members have unfettered access to our house.
When I insisted that my mother must come and stay with us for a while, my wife had the guts to tell me that she was told by a prophet that my mother is a witch and would cause a lot of distress in our lives.
That was when I decided that I had had enough and I told her so. I have given her an ultimatum: it is either she accepts my mother or the marriage would be over. No woman can ever take the place of my mother as long as she is still alive.
Dear readers, on Morning Teaser today, do you think Emdy has taken the right step? Should he back his wife or support his mother?
~ Thomas Jefferson